I’ve got to hand it to Mayor Richard Daley: He may be the inarticulate master of a ruthelss Chicago machine, but he likes him some arts. Hence today, the Bard’s 445th b-day, proclaimed by Hizzoner himself to be “Talk Like Shakespeare Day.”
Sure you could use this as an opportunity to refer to coworkers as “You blocks! You stones! You worse than senseless things!” or as a flock of “bunch-back’d hedge-pigs.” But why stop with just talking like Shakespeare? Act like him too!
Got some funeral-baked meats? Coldly furnish forth someone’s marriage table!
Have a rede? Reke it! (Your own, only, however.)
Got some branches from Birnam Wood? Come to Dunsinane!
Or perhaps you’re an old black ram — this is a perfect time to tup a white ewe, if you know what I mean. Wink wink! (Note of caution, however: Keep your peepers on your handkerchief.)